All She Wants For Christmas

My parents NEVER tell me what they want for Christmas, or even give any ideas – yet this year I gave them an ultimatum, and they finally came through!  My mother would like an Ove Glove or some perfume that she is almost out of.  My dad is interested in a work stool that I already picked up a few days ago with my pal Angie, at Sam’s Club.

I had to probe further on the whole perfume thing however.  It turns out Celine Dion has at least two fragrances out.  My mother only specified that it was called Celine Dion, and the first perfume I found was called Celine Dion – Superific, or something to that effect.  This is kind of how the conversation went:

Me: So what do you and dad want for Christmas?
Mom: Well I have two ideas, and your dad has one.
Me: (In complete and utter shock) REALLY!?  What are they?…!
Mom: Well I would like an Ove Glove, and I am almost out of my perfume.
Me: Oh really?  I bought you a huge thing last year, you already went through your ‘Exclamation’?
Mom: I’ve been using another one too, called Celine Dion.
Me: Oh.  Does it make you smell like Canada?
Mom: Yes.
Me: I bet it comes with instructions on how to apply it.
Mom: …
Me: Do you just spray it on your hands and pound on your chest?  Is that the proper application of Celine Dion fragrances?
Mom: *laughing* Yes, sometimes.

Needless to say – my mom is getting a nice bottle of Celine Dion (Self titled, not Super-awesome scent)… hopefully she will not take up going for older dudes etc like the real Celine.  My mom used to have a thing for Kenny Rogers – and although I want a brother pretty bad, I’d settle for one that’s not a half-brother… and let her stick with my dad.

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