Where Newman Has Gone Before

I just got done watching Star Trek and am very happy to report that it’s a pretty darn good piece of film, and would recommend it to everyone who even kind-of likes Sci-Fi movies.

I will admit I was worried when I saw Tyler Perry playing one of the Admirals – I mean I could very easily see the movie ruined if Madea popped out and James T. Kirk was scolded by the Blue-Haired stereo-type ladled sycophant.  But I digress, he played the part extremely well.  In fact it was probably 78,126,228% better than Samuel L. Jackson’s portrayal of Mace Windu in those last few Star Wars movies.  Has there ever been a more boring Jedi?  I submit that there has not.

I am slowly coming to grips with all the step-actors coming through the US movie houses.  Maybe I was just naïve in thinking that all English speaking people in the movies were American.  I mean, they had no accents really, unless they were East Coast-ish, which is nothing to sneeze at, but still.  We have a gob of Australian actors and actresses swarming the movies now, dropping their accents and becoming basically American stand-ins.

Maybe the American gene pool is just too shallow these days?  Maybe it’s presumptuous for me to think its their fault for taking over.  More forward thinking and decent American actors is what we need!  That or to reclaim who judges talent around here.

Seriously, two of the biggest shows on TV these days is American Idol, and America’s Got Talent.  Hmmmm… nice titles – makes me wanna eat some apple pie and kiss my mom.  America-anything in the title creates the desire to wave flags and shoot at animals, have them stuffed and mounted on my wall.  Heck, I even want to race snow machines and lay oil pipe lines!  I can’t yet kick out all the illegal aliens, since that’s probably who makes my precious Circus Peanuts… but once I stock up – I wanna kick them out too!

But the problem isn’t my patriotic spirit, oh no.  It’s that both of these shows have British judges, two of three, on each!  American Idol supposedly just signed on Posh Spice to replace Paula Abdul.  I think that’s the official seventh sign of the apocalypse, and I want out.  Why are the British deemed worthy to judge our talent?  They don’t listen to our judging of their lack of decent dentistry – although that could just be part of their top class, Johnny-on-the-spot socialized medicine they have over there… hmmmm…  *note to self*.

Now I see that Gerard Butler has a new movie coming out (“Law Abiding Citizen”) with my all time favorite actor Jamie Foxx.  (Sarcasm added.)  I liked Gerard in “300″, and in “Rock and Rolla”, but now he’s pushing it.  Even though this movie looks really-really good, and he finally seems to play “the bad guy who was originally the happy family loving good guy, who got his butt handed to him, and is really only bad because he wanted justice, but went too far, so really he IS the bad guy – even though we felt bad for him in the beginning”-guy.  I mean how many times have we seen THAT role?  *Yawn*

Next thing you know he’ll be showing his pouty haggis-eating Scotsman face on guest appearances of ‘CSI Kennedy Compound’ or something.  And that will just be too far.  I mean the Kennedy’s have been through enough already.  I’m not poking fun either – I dig Teddy.  In fact I already sent my favorite photos of him to my surgeon so I can get those jaw and chin prosthetics put in.  Look out ladies – I’m about to be irresistible.